If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Randomize
