Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
nutella sex= disaster
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
10+ Incredible Tumblr Stories That Will Leave You Shook
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
16 People Who Have Raised The Bar For Petty Revenge
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time