If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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