How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Randomize
