why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Randomize
