we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize