i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
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