You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
