No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
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