Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Randomize
