sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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