Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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