so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
