no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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