try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Randomize
