Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
Randomize
