Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Randomize
