so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
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