I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
I think I just sharted jello shots
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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