my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
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