This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Boobs are out for the taking
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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