Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Randomize
