that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize