It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning