Taylor Swift is so right about you.
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
These Medical Professionals Recall the Worst Cases of Hypochondria They’ve Seen
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
These People Are The Epitome of Lazy
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?