This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Randomize
