Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
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