So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
