Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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