My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize
