yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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