She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
