is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize
