Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
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