So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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