Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
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