Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
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