we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
