His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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