The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
did you just send me my own nude
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
