Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
someone threw a dead crab at me
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Randomize
