suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize