I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Randomize
