are you so shy because you have an std?
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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