I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
its not stalking. its research.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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