yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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