Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
