I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
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