Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
