he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
